Home
brainwash_xx's Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
brainwash_xx

secret agent spies newspaper x

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[01 Oct 2005|12:08pm]
[ mood | content ]
[ music | buzzcocks - teenage kicks ]

i was so sad and lost
since me and justin broke up
i didnt want to involve myself in anything

i really lost myself in those months
i found someone. who has filled that gap

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

5 add?

[23 Sep 2005|10:04pm]
i've been grounded
and really depressed
so the computer seems lame
all i do is sit around and sleep
and watch tv

im so bored with my life
tonight was the interpol concert i had to miss

i started crying thinking i wanted someone to listen to them with me
and lay with me, and cuddle with me. and kiss with me

then i cried harder remembering i had that.
the most beautiful girl chelsea smith.
shes there at interpol, and i would give anything to be there and hearing that music with her
taking it in with her
i know we're just friends
but im still in love...


im such a fuckin freak


my family from new orleans comes tomorrow.
they were in ft. worth. they might be staying with us now cause of hurricane rita


i really need a date to homecoming
i wont be online a lot so get ahold of me at
918.406.2155
only school requirement is this form to be filled out and under 21



i fancy some boys at my school
names are
cody, daniel, and tim
add?

[17 Sep 2005|10:25pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]
[ music | alkaline trio - stained in satin ]

i just watched a independent documentary of punk by don letts

beautiful. and got me thinking again





heres a big fuck you. fuck everything that people think about me. people think im such a huge slut and i have fuckin aids and all of this sick stuff
a lot of you are so insecure with yourself you could never do the things i do. and i've heard it from girls before. i hold some peoples secrets in my palm.
im not gonna fuckin lie for you after hookin up. if you're so ashamed or did something wrong to you're girlfriend or who you love.
then you should of never fuckin did it.

fuck everything you people think. i do what makes me happy. i love being loud. i love looking different. i love standing out. making people attracted to me. people wanting to learn more
i'd do anything to be noticed. i need fuckin attention and im not afraid of admitting that.
so thank you everyone for keeping my name is your mouth. it makes me happy and satisfied.
thanks to everyone who is in such desperate need to know who i fucked last weekend.

i have a fuckin book i write all of my sexual things in. i've been around some blocks. some fuckin highways you might say.
i dont care
its my fuckin body. its my fuckin mind. i have the ability to make my own fuckin choices. something people need to come to terms with.


people need to be angry. people need to show some reaction to fuckin things going on. you cant let people walk all over you. you cant let your 'friends' do that. fuckin fight back. BE PISSED OFF. im tired of seeing these passive people who think im wrong for not liking people. im not a fuckin hippy. not everything is peace. i'll make a lot of love and some a lot of pot. but im not gonna be happy with things. and i rather show anger then saddness.
wouldnt you agree? crying all the time about things that go wrong is pointless. GET UP AND DO SOMETHING

i dont want my strong headed friends replying. cause im the same way and it will just piss us off at each other. i have my views. i can not stand bush but one of my friends, cameron, is very pro. but im not gonna fight him about it. let him have his own political views.

on terms of friends. i have little i consider friends. most of you are aqquaintences. who think you know so much about me. you dont.
and all the boys who think i like you, you're probably not my most wanted man. meaning you dont mean as much.

some guys were put on this earth to fuckin satify some of my dumb needs. and im the same to them. and i respect it.
the human body is beautiful. take off your clothes and worship it

2 add?

[17 Sep 2005|02:05pm]
[ music | white devil - alexisonfire ]

im good with guys and im bad. last night was really good.
kinda like last weekend because chris and kyle were there.


i need a date to homecoming. i know who i want to be with me. but who knows



my hair looks so much better in person
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

add?

[15 Sep 2005|03:36pm]
[ music | sic transit gloria, glory fades - brand new ]

"I'm going to die very soon. Before my 21st birthday. I won't live to be 21. I'm never gonna be old. I don't ever wanna be ugly and old. I'm an old lady now anyhow. I'm 80. There's nothing left. I've already lived a whole lifetime. I'm going out. In a blaze of glory."
- Nancy Spungen



thats exactly how i feel. completely

2 add?

[14 Sep 2005|07:19pm]

yea im sorry, i pretty much suck at life


Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
you can barely see my new hair here




and i hate to say it. but i like my school friends a lot more than anyone else right now


Anticipate and evaluate What he thought And what I thought before You’re broken like me Like me before Dark place is your place I take dark drive to your place You’re staring me You’re staring with your inside eyes Knowing you, knowing me We’re deeply sorry You’re broken maybe baby Maybe it didn’t happen Maybe all of this would go away And if we’re ever young again He’ll anticipate We’ll evaluate

6 add?

[14 Sep 2005|06:59am]
[ music | boys night out - a torrid love affair ]

i really hope i make someone happy some day


i had dreams that past 2 nights about nick and justin
nick disappointed me in his
and in the one with justin, i was happier then i could ever imagine




soon i will post more art pictures, when im not sleeping. cause thats all i really do

add?

[12 Sep 2005|07:49pm]
things are going down hill
my friend is almost decapitated. but lives. but will never be able to talk again
nick is now dating his ex girlfriend, i am alone.
my parents come walking in while i cry about nick. my mom is crying and yelling at my dad, they have come back from marriage counseling.
do i smell a divorce cooking?


im looking up artists


some of these are sexual )
8 add?

[11 Sep 2005|05:48pm]
[ music | between the buried and me - laser speed ]

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com


you all will be happy to here
its over.


yes, mankind, i do not satisfy anyone.


last night i hung out with kyle and chris haney. pretty fun driving around.


and going to someones house i dont even like


and a lot of skaters.


and chinese fingers hahaha


i secretly always love my best friend kyle. even though we have problems and dont agree on certain things


on a brighter note, im getting my hair done on tuesday. cut and bleached


Image hosted by Photobucket.com


i also gauged my septum up to a 14. and now have balls haha

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
1 add?

[05 Sep 2005|05:45pm]
[ music | madball - pushin me ]

thanks guys. i need all of that last night
to realise tulsa can be good sometimes.
it was also nice to have an intelligent conversation with tommy


Image hosted by Photobucket.com
no one drives anymore cause of the gas
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
but what a nice day it is
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
bronwyn, katelyn, morgan, and ashley
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
joe and bronwyn
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
joe, bronwyn, katelyn, and morgan
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
bronwyn and joe
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
ashley was screaming at all the cars going by
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
bronwyn and katelyn
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
morgan and ashley
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
ashley
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
katelyn and ashley
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
me and ashley
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
terra spitting
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
people
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
bronwyn is a pimp
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
glenn and bronwyn
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
stuart and bronwyn
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
FUCK MAXENE
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
party
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
the amazing tree
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
todd and petesy
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
who hates me
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
im not kidding

4 add?

[31 Aug 2005|05:06pm]
things have been all over the place

i reunited with chris. but hes moving to dallas tomorrow
i just got back from hanging out with him and getting a little high
i will miss him but he has promised to visit sometimes
we were really important to each other at a time and we've realized all of things again. but aren't gonna try them

people are spreading rumors that i have aids.


i've been spending a lot of time in OKC with this amazingly special boy, nick.
hes 21 and is just about my everything right now.
i guess we're sorta dating.
its never been said
but we both like each other just hate the distance
i was with him last weekend and i plan to see him again this weekend and actually attend the agony scene/remembering never/throwdown/sinai beach show. im glad its only $12
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
both of me and nick



the 2 more or less immature guys that have caught my eye at school are matt and brady.
brady - i have always had a crush on him. last year he tried to make me feel like shit but he apologized late summer and we've been talking again. i think hes adorable and so kind. but he is always so busy. i'd date him in a heart beat.
matt - hes really dumb and short but im attracted to him. in a sexual friendship kinda way. im trying to work my game but hes never at school any more. oh well
3 add?

things i think about [23 Aug 2005|10:11pm]
songs and quotes )
add?

[21 Aug 2005|01:51pm]
i've never felt more alone

ps. your immaturity is sickening
my ex boyfriend decided to let me know he hates me
you cheated on me.

survery )
2 add?

[19 Aug 2005|04:23pm]
[ mood | hot ]

so
i went to okc sunday or saturay
i dont remember
and when i was fucked up i wanted to take pictures of myself
so heres the result
excuse my weirdness
dont cha wish your girlfriend was hot LIKE ME )

5 add?

[18 Aug 2005|04:30pm]
summer is offically over.
i slept a good 2 hours.
someone on my mind. jesus.
it was good seeing all of my girls again
though i will always feel like an outcast
1st hour is drawing and i could not understand the women. shes from taiwan or something and it was impossible. but its pretty funny cause i have it with laura, julia, jessica, and woody.
2nd hour the teacher annoyed me. its biology. so it was really quit and sitting there. the only person i really know is elise.
3rd hour is fashion merchandising. it seemed really fun. i have it with miller! which makes the world go around. and katie is in it too.
then we went to lunch which was like a good 5 minutes. so i found 4th hour with is algebra 1 and the teacher is totally chill. and of course since now im finally in algebra due to my retard self everyone in there is fucked up stoners. haha i got aram and chris fling which i could quit possibly kill him. he reminds me of this guy corey. megan h is also in there and it just makes everything really funny.
5th hour is with a mr. garrison! i have it with miller and we were hoping it was gonna be funny but its not. its lame. english will suck again
6th is with a new teacher. who hopefully will relax a little and take some stuff up her butt. and of couse another class with miller.
i love having 3 classes with her. 4 years we've been together now. haha
after school it was me, kyndall, and miller trying to fight traffic. ah the horrors. oh well.
tomorrow is a friday.
hittin up the city with my girls mary and kara.
add?

[17 Aug 2005|02:38pm]
my summer in photographs
yes, i start school tomorrow

summer )
5 add?

[14 Aug 2005|09:43pm]
drugs are insane
i was drugged out of my mind last night
like 4 different things i think
i still havent slept
and i think i will soon
i love OKC
nick was really fuckin good
and hes so cute
and in the morning
at like 7 it was so cute. us wrestling and him talking to me while i sit on the bathroom counter







i want something simplistic.

i wanna be dreadfully skinny and drugged and in love.
its wrong i know
10 add?

[12 Aug 2005|03:20pm]
[ mood | bored ]

sorry for my hiatus
i've been busy i guess
i enrolled for school yesterday. and i start the 18th
im gonna try and do stuff right this year so i dont have to do so many extra classes to actually pass
we have to give away bella. we've only had her for 3 or 4 months. but shes changed all of our lives. we cant even look at or acknowledge ladybug with out bella seriously launching at her and trying to kill her. last night someone bit me and punctured through my fingernail. it hurts really bad still.

i've made friends everywhere.
i have dear kids like us now in orlando
wonderful nate in cali
lopez who has always been my friend in KC better be visiting me and along with alli.
myspace can introduce you to some great people
thats why i dont think i could ever get rid of it.

oh well
im gonna start frequenting livejournal a lot again.

add?

[13 Jul 2005|01:50am]
During sex do you like...
to be on top?no
to be on bottom?yea
it rough?yea
it soft?no
to just fuck?yes
to make sweet love?yes
anal, vaginal or oral?vaginal, oral
Legs up or down?either
Screaming and yelling?lots
Deep moaning?lots
Scratching?yes
Biting?yes
Licking?maybe
Hair pulling?yes
During sex do you...
Stay in one position?no
Switch postions?yes
Keep your sox on?haha i dont wear them
Keep your shirt on?sometimes
Only drop your pants to your knees?no
Scream and yell?yes
Moan?yes
Scratch?yes
Bite?yes
Pull hair?yes
Yell their name?yes
Fantasize about the person?yes
Fantasize about someone else?no
Give commands?yes

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
1 add?

[11 Jul 2005|07:02pm]
[ music | fiona apple - if we kissed ]

im getting back on track
yesterday was sounds of the under ground
i dont really have any good pictures
i got in between a fight. it sucked i was trampled. i thought they were attacking daniel so i hit someone in the back of the head they hit me and through me on the ground. where my tube top fell down. and some guy pulled me out and fondled me. i was pissed.
i told jusitn and he got mad : )
we're friends now

be jealous of the bands i saw....well not all of them
clutch (Sucked), poison the well, unearth, norma jean, every time i die, throwndown, high on fire, madball, a life once lost, all that remains, devildriver, fear before the march of flames, gwar
i was out eating during opeth and strapping young lad. oh well. and left before i saw lamb of god anda chimaria. which i kinda wanted to see chimaria
gwar is fuckin amazing so be jealous. so is madball and throwdown. awesome pits during that.
good times

2 add?

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]

Advertisement